I never write anything specific about Dean – nor did I write specifically about my ex – most people just connect the dots in my writing. BUT… I received a simple text message that was so profound this morning that I am breaking that rule just a bit.
First of all let me preface this entire post by dispelling any myths that I am this perfect soul – I am not – and I am a lot to deal with at times. Dean takes all that comes with me in stride, right! This morning in a text exchange I was apologizing for me not being the most pleasant person yesterday…… and he sees my struggle. His response instantly brought tears to my eyes. “I ache when you struggle”. He ACHES…., not he gets pissed off, or he ignores me – HE ACHES. I looked up the definition of the word this morning just to see the full breadth of the word. One meaning states – “causing distress, deep emotion or longing.” There it is folks – when I am at my worst he ACHES for me – how beautiful is that?
Soooo…… many know from my previous post that Dean did not write his wedding vows – he really leaves that kind of mushy talk between just him and I. But if I could write his vows for me by what I witness everyday in my relationship with him here is what they would say:
I Dean, take you Melissa for the rest of my life. I promise to always be faithful to you NEVER EVER letting my eyes wonder. You are enough. You fill my cup. I desire you and only you.
I promise to be patient with you, especially when you are undeserving of patience.
I will ache when you ache, I will laugh when you laugh, I will cry when you cry.
I promise to find joy in the simplest of moments with you – longing for nothing more than just you – your touch, your face, your time.
I promise to love you so completely even beyond what you thought was possible – loving you more today than I did yesterday and loving you more tomorrow than on the first day I loved you.
I promise to always be by your side and come along with whatever shenanigans you have planned. I am in – sign me up. Wherever you go – I go. We are one.
I promise to be your help mate – helping make your life easier in every facet and at every level. Just let me help…. Put me in coach.
I promise to always tell you the truth, always say I am sorry, always have a kind word for you, always be willing to compromise and always attempt to be funny just to see you smile or laugh.
I will embrace growing old with you and love every moment of our simple happy life together – even when its not so simple.
I will love you completely forever and ever until I take my last breath
THIS! THIS is what he would have said but doesn’t need to because he models it EVERY SINGLE DAY for me! He is the absolute love of my life. Even in the moments where I struggle – I see the beauty in our relationship – the overwhelming beauty at that. He will be quite embarrassed that I put him out on display but gosh I needed to sing this from the treetops! I love that man!
EDIT- this is not an exaggeration!! This is truly who he is in the most humblest way. I just see it so clearly because I have had the extreme opposite for so many years. #Perspective #IHopeINeverLoseSightOfThisPerspective