Many of you have asked me about my Mom and how she is doing these days without my dad, so I thought I would pen a post about her. I won’t lie, at first it was extremely difficult for her and I would imagine she still has her dark days – Death is brutal you know and grief takes you on a long journey of which none of us are equipped for. And for me it has been heartbreaking and painful to watch her battle that grief – Soulmates and life partners separated by death – it brings tears to my eyes even typing it.
BUT in her difficult journey – adding insult to injury – a Pandemic comes along- one that requires everyone to isolate and quarantine. Let me just say, that mixture can magnify the grief and the fact that you are alone. Most would have buckled, given up…. but not my mom. As she says, we come from a long line of survivors!
She has had a resolve within her to continue to live her best life – as she is a young 70 something and has a good number of years left on this earth. She still works part time, is very physically active and refuses to hire someone to tend to her yard work. She told me shortly after my dad died that she would not refuse any invitation – if invited she would go – and she has held true to that. Going to dinners with friends and family, girl trips out of town, and even playing tennis (she is still a beast on the court). She has even traveled with my family on vacation – even when she knew it wouldn’t feel right – she muscled through it and managed to enjoy herself through her tears. Even though this has to be the most painful thing she has ever gone through she has kept her spirits high – she is rebuilding her life and making plans for lots more travel and time with friends (after the pandemic of course).
One silver lining to the pandemic is that life has slowed down for me and my bunch. I am around more and my littles spend many hours at her house – cooking, sewing, gardening and just chilling with her. She is even able to see the bigs as they are working from home.
And let me mention my parent’s wonderful friends – that have embraced her, checked on her and invite her. The community of people they so loved have shown up and continue to do so. That kind of friendship and loyalty you cannot put a price on.
I am so proud of her – never letting even her grief or coronavirus ever dampen her light, remaining steadfast and positive. Even finding it within her to encourage others in their times of trouble.
My dad is certainly smiling down on her and I know that he is grateful that she is doing good – not that he ever thought any different – he knew her well!
If you are reading this and you have someone that you know is alone, whether widowed or divorced, reach out – The isolation of all that is going on can be hard. Let’s pass on some love! The world definitely needs it.